I'd have to agree about the "OMG I NEED XXX feature" thing, though i am probably just as guilty as anyone of lusting after new features, I just have a different method about it
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My projects are all pure hobbies, so there's no rush. for the most part im not even trying to make anything in particular, just play with stuff and learn things. so if i run into a limit, I either try and fix it, or just say "well, im sure if i wait a while, the irrlicht devs will figure this out for me."
and know what, they usually do. given some time. irrklang made openAL obsolete for me (I had made a nice OpenAL wrapper and nodes some time ago), I liked the neatness of the audiere API, but i wanted 3d. IrrKlang is the best of both.
I started to build an XML based editor of my own, then Niko made IrrEdit...almost obsoletes the need for it, if only the userdata bit would get done, but like i said, ill just be patient, then all will be well.
I don't care whether you bought the source engine or what, you WILL have to do some customization to do a complex game, no engine is so generic as to need nothing added to make it perfect for your particular game...its always gonna take some work.
so the bottom line is this, dont bitch. either fix it yourself, or be patient. if you wanna make a feature request, keep in mind its nice to be polite, and above all, patient.
after all, you're getting this for free!!
if you have a particular hard-on for knowing what's on the block as far as irrlicht dev, check out the SVN commit comments, gives a little insight...